 |
 |
I open the door and I go
in.
The air is hot and stuffy, the
pain begins.
My heart is heavy, I cannot breathe,
I remember her cry, I try to
leave.
But I can't go, I must stay and
face my pain,
Or all of this will be in vain.
I sit down and look around,
I put my Scotch (Dutch courage),
on the ground.
I see her little night light,
the memories flood in,
Of the tube feeds and medicines.
Now my tears begin.
Those cold August nights, with
the heater on high,
She was only in here a week,
but how the time flies.
I feel a smile on my face,
for the memories are sweet,
The haunting feeling is dulled.
Will I try for defeat?
I see the highchair, where she
will never sit,
But also the rocking chair and
how she loved it.
The pain is softened, as my memories
proceed,
My dreams mingle with them, I
know I'll succeed.
I'm glad I went into that
room which is 'Spare'.
The memories fill me with warmth,
although my dreams are still there.
I remember the cuddles, the love
and the kisses,
Her strange little cry. Oh God,
how I miss it.
Tonight I will sleep with the
door open wide,
For my memories and dreams, are
no longer to hide.
Sharon Swinney turned to poetry
as a way to deal with her grief after her daughter died. Mary was only
7 ½ weeks old when she died from a Congential Heart Defect. Sharon
describes this even as "The hardest thing that our family has ever had
to deal with."
Sharon found the poetry very
helpful and was encouraged by others to put her poems together in a book.
She was helped by the SANDS (Stillbirth And Neonatal Death Support, incl.
miscarriage) organization in Australia to get the book published. She has
discovered with her book that, "Mary seems to have been able to reach out
and touch more people since her death, than she could in her life. I think
she would have been pleased."
Sharon's motivation for creating
the book, and for sharing her poems can be summarized in the following
verse:
From
the Heart by Sharon Swinney
A collection of poems written
from a mother's heart, following the death of her young daughter Mary.
For more of Sharon's poems visit her website for Mary at:
SANDS is handling the sales of
this book. The book costs $14AU which includes postage. They have credit
card facilities for Master Card, Visa and Bank card.
If you are interested you can
contact them: